About
Personal statements seem to be characterized by contradictions and conundrums: just be yourself, be interesting and unique, and don’t try to be anything you’re not. Really, they are a way that people see how well you present your life, perspectives, and the topics that you know best. Personal statements are a test of your writing and communications skills as much as they are about learning more about you.
Writing Tips: Personal Statements
Be creative, but with purpose.
Taking your writing from raw, stream-of-consciousness freewriting to a polished, evocative final statement involves careful editing of your thoughts into logical narratives and proper grammar. While the beauty of your thoughts unbothered by grammar is artistic and free, the ability for your readers to understand exactly what you mean is much more important in this case. So, freewrite til you’re content, but make sure that you have allowed yourself the time to clean up, organize, and focus your thoughts into something that clearly expresses what you wanted to say.
Freewriting is a method of brainstorming ideas and concepts for a paper.
- You can begin to freewrite without a topic in mind, or you can freewrite about a certain topic that you have selected.
- While freewriting, don’t worry about spelling, grammar, or style. Simply try to let your thoughts come out as though you were saying them.
- Later, go back and read through your writing
- Keep your natural style while revising your thoughts into complete sentences and ideas.
Make your topic all about YOU.
Choose a particular aspect of who you are or what you are interested in to focus on. Then, use ‘evidence’, such as personal stories, examples of struggles or success, or proof of interests and ambitions from your life to explain and support how it developed, why it is important, or how it sets you apart. Do not simply reiterate lists of accomplishments and activities that are already included in your application. Use these guidelines to help you write, organize, and revise your personal statement.
Focus, focus, focus!
Although the scope of a personal statement can seem expansive, the best personal statements have a single, consistent theme. Given your one- or two-page limit, you probably only have room to fully develop one topic or story. Write this compellingly and with a clear direction, and your personal statement will tell much more about you than a laundry list of interests and activities.
- Stick to one or two core topics.
- Develop a consistent theme.
- Have a ‘thesis’ that states your theme and how you will build your statement around that theme.
- You may be responding to a particular question. Even if you are not, you should have a clear theme and direction in your statement. Write out exactly what you are writing about and why, or what it says about you. This is like a thesis statement for your statement.
- State your thesis near the beginning of your statement. The best place to state your thesis is at the end of your introduction.
- Logically arrange support for your thesis, such as examples or stories.
- Conclude by returning to what you say in your introduction.
- Wrap up your theme beyond just wrapping up your story.
- If a question you are responding to directs you to relate a story, like an event that altered your perspective, you can write a narrative. You should have a common theme and explain clearly how the story you choose responds to the question.
- Finish your statement with a reference to your theme, wrapping up your story and demonstrating how it suits the purpose of your statement.
Organize your writing.
The order in which you build an essay or narrative has a great effect on how its meaning comes across to your reader. While it may be fun to have a surprise twist or express your creativity through an unconventional essay, being able to express yourself clearly is one quality or characteristic that admissions officers are seeking. Organizing your thoughts into paragraphs and putting them in logical order makes your essay stronger by helping the reader follow your ideas and interpret them the way you intend.
- Organize and order your ideas in paragraphs.
- Make your ideas and direction clear at the beginning of your statement and in each paragraph.
- Use transition words to move your narrative and make logical connections between ideas.
Give yourself time to review and revise.
Review your writing many times with people who know you well. Always proofread your statement before considering it finished. If you have time, put your writing aside for a few days and read it again.
Writing a polished, compelling personal statement takes time and careful thought but is not an impossible task. You do not have to fit your whole life in a few pages; you simply need to prove that you can write meaningfully about something that is important to you. While you should reach out to people who know you well to help you, remember that the best person to write about you is you.
Use impeccable grammar and style.
The grammar and style of your personal statement are two of the most important aspects (parts or characteristics) of your essay. Carefully review your essay through the grammar checker, but also be prepared to think about what you were trying to say as you correct your grammar.
Grammar is one way of organizing your thoughts so that they are easily understood by others. It is more than being right or wrong; grammar often means making choices about meaning. Cleaning up your grammar will make your thoughts more interesting to read. Follow these grammar and style tips to improve your writing:
- Be direct and clear so that what you tell comes across without confusion.
- Use first person, active voice in most cases. The active voice is less wordy and more direct than the passive voice.
- For example, instead of writing “My passion for volunteerism was inspired by the lonely times I spent in the hospital with candystripers for company”, say “The many times I felt lonely in the hospital when candy-striped nurses’ helpers kept my spirits up inspire my passion for volunteerism.”
- Passive language also turns verbs into other parts of speech.
- For example, “Spending the summer in Paris was an important learning experience for me” is passive. “I learned a lot about … during the summer I spent in Paris” is active and more informative. Avoid using such ‘buried’ verbs.
- Vary your sentence lengths and structures.
- Keep your subjects in the beginnings of your sentences.
- Divide long strings of clauses (subject and verb combinations) into shorter, simpler sentences.
Elements of Personal Statements
Formal essay structure
Unless specifically directed otherwise by an institution or organization to which you are applying, a personal statement should follow the traditional, formal essay structure. It should include an introduction with a hook (nothing cheesy), one or more body paragraphs (depending on length requirements/limitations), and a conclusion.
Personal theme
The reviewers of your personal statement want to know about YOU, so be sure that your personal statement includes a theme that brings them insight about you as a person AND as a potential student or employee.
Specific knowledge of the institution or organization
Demonstrating that you have thoroughly researched the institution or organization shows reviewers that your interest is genuine and that you know “what you’re getting into”.
Key personal insights
When appropriate, try to share key personal insights that align with the values and strengths of the institution or organization to which you are applying.
See a Model: Personal Statement
This personal statement was written for application to a specific graduate program; hence, it has a clear academic focus. It is responding to the prompt on the application, “Describe how your life experiences and aspirations make you a fitting candidate for this program. What are your interests and goals for your study at this institution?”
Depending on why you are writing a personal statement, your statement may be more general or have a different focus. Use the questions that your application asks as a guide for how to respond.
Well-crafted personal statement
R. Alexander
Application #8900317 (Item 1)
“I learned to dress a certain way if I was negotiating the higher education maze. I had to trim my afro.” (Item 2)
Dr. Thomas Mearl Midgette,
From Black Issues in Higher Education, December 7, 2000 (Item 3)
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If only it were so simple: get a haircut; get an education. I have found in my own education, activism, and brief working career that it is not simple, and the complex art of negotiating elite institutions, particularly for members of underrepresented groups in education, fascinates me. (Item 4) Elite institutions of higher education in the US have undergone dramatic changes in recent decades in conjunction with society’s expanding commitment to diversity and multiculturalism. But what do these institutions demand and expect from their formerly disenfranchised members, and how does the new diversity affect these institutions? In less academic terms, what in the world does an afro have to do with an education? (Item 5)
I intend to explore the multiple adaptation strategies used by “diverse students” in elite academic institutions. (Item 6) During my education in college I observed that many of the students able to negotiate their way through the “higher education maze,” as Midgette calls it, had already experienced elite institutions in their high school years. They had acquired the social capital to understand the sacrifices that would be asked of them and were willing and able to converse with the elite institution and its constituents with less anger and dissatisfaction. Other students who had not learned exactly what the burden of representation entailed in an elite, diversifying institutions now struggled with that same experience. (Item 7) I hope to research this divide and posit that it may be an overlooked aspect of the success of nonprofit education access programs such as RISE and Uplift–not only do their students get strong academic preparation, they also learn how to negotiate “diversity” while being supported by an understanding program within their home community, instead of at college, away from home for (likely) the first time. (Item 8)
With a better understanding of the dynamics of “diversifying” elite education, I believe there may be a number of conceivable programs that could alleviate the tensions plaguing the institutions while confirming different cultural backgrounds within one educational setting. (Item 9) Many such programs may already exist and simply need expansion or replication. I hope to clarify how and why these programs work through my graduate work and later as a professor within higher education, or by helping support such programs through the nonprofit sector. (Item 10)
Throughout my high school and college years, I have been invested in these issues as a student leader, workshop facilitator, and activist. (Item 11) Throughout my coursework at my school, especially with Professor Colbert, I grew to believe that I could play a role in addressing these issues as an academic. I took two tutorials with Professor Colbert my senior year. (Item 12) A tutorial is a weekly course with two students and one professor based on the Oxford model that allows greater freedom for the students and faculty but also demands much more effort and accountability. These tutorials were critical in molding my voice as a scholar and my confidence in my original and critical thinking. (Item 13) Moreover, these courses introduced the vocabulary of anthropology and sociology, from Sahlin’s “structure of conjuncture” (not only a fun-sounding phrase, but surprisingly useful as well) (Item 14) to ideas of social and cultural capital and how a cultural practice can simultaneously transform and reproduce a societal system. That vocabulary and theory can and should be in a greater conversation with multiculturalism in education and society in general, and I look forward to playing an active role in pushing that conversation forward. (Item 15) Though it has taken a year away from college for me to fully realize it, Colbert’s classes gave me the desire and grounding with which to identify and pursue my interest in graduate school.
There are a number of opportunities through your school’s sociology program that attract me. (Item 16) I am drawn toward the cluster system as a supportive yet challenging system within which to work and collaborate. I am also interested in potentially pursuing a joint degree in Sociology and Education, as my research interests span both departments and your school is one of the few schools to advertise its support for such a joint degree. I feel that your support of interdisciplinary study signals an understanding that sociology can, and often should, inform and interact with other modes of thought. Finally, the faculty at your school have conducted and inspired innovative research in education and diversity, leading the field and influencing my perspectives. Professors Jones’ and Lee’s work on social capital, educational aspirations, and especially Professor Jones’ work on students of color at elite institutions, has helped inspire me to study sociology, and I would be honored to work with them in pursuing my own research.
Having experienced the challenges of diversifying education from a number of positions, I hope to revisit them now from an academic perspective. (Item 17) The richness and variety of my experiences as an undergrad and admissions officer have led me to yearn for a greater clarity of this issue and why it continues to be such a challenge today. (Item 18) Further, my acute personal knowledge of the injustice in issues of race and higher education have inspired me to try to change this system that I have come to know so well. (Item 19) My studies have led me down a path that I hope will end fruitfully at your institution, where the academic environment and community provide a model of how study can affect change in society and the institutions around us. Such a philosophy I harbor as well, and I would be honored to share in your program’s mission and efforts and to someday spread this philosophy through teaching. (Item 20)
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What makes the model personal statement effective
Item 1. Check your directions for a required heading. You will probably need to write your name and an identifying number at the top of every page you submit with your application.
Item 2. This writer uses a pithy quotation to interest the reader. The quote is also relevant to the theme of this statement, which is about the writer’s desire to study diversity in education. Use an interesting introduction to draw your reader into your topic.
Item 3. The origin of the quotation is identified. Whenever you quote someone else’s words, you must note who originally said them and where.
Item 4. The author’s first sentence ties the quotation into his statement. Always make references to quotations that you include. Do not use a quotation without explaining how it relates to your writing.
Item 5. The writer uses both intellectual terminology and more common language to describe his interests. This use of language shows that he is familiar with the field-specific terms of the program to which he is applying. Plus, it keeps the writing lively by not becoming too bogged down in terminology–this isn’t a research paper; it’s a statement about who you are.
Item 6. This paragraph answers one of the application’s questions. It states what the writer wants to research at the program. It introduces this topic in the first sentence.
Item 7. The writer supports this statement of interest with background from his experiences.
Item 8. The writer ends the paragraph by returning to what he hopes to accomplish at the program. He explains how these experiences contribute to his research interests and wraps up the paragraph. Do not just state your experiences. Explain them and give them structure.
Item 9. The writer makes strong statements using the active voice. He often uses the first person “I,” which is acceptable in personal statements.
Item 10. Here, the writer explains his goals in more detail. Because this statement is written for a graduate program, his goals may be more specific and developed than yours are at this point. Being as specific as possible in your answers, however, shows that you have thought carefully about the question.
Item 11. This paragraph returns to the writer’s educational background to show his academic interest in the program. He indicates some of his activities and interests and explains that they contributed to his present interests.
Item 12. The writer focuses on one experience that is the most valuable to his academic aspirations. He describes it briefly but in detail.
Item 13. This information may also explain entries on his application and transcript that the reviewer may not understand, such as the “tutorials” that shaped his interests. Don’t use your essay to make excuses or narrate your whole life, but do use it to explain parts of your life that are more meaningful than other people may think at first.
Item 14. The writer interjects a bit of personality into this more serious paragraph. This attempt may or may not work. Be wary of using humor, irony, and sarcasm in personal statements.
Item 15. The writer makes a strong, confident statement. Be assertive and confident in your writing.
Item 16. The writer shows that he has done his research and knows about the school he is applying to. He shows that he has concrete reasons for applying to this program and tries to convince the reader that he will be a good fit there.
Item 17. The conclusion wraps up all of the writer’s points and reiterates his theme and statement of interest.
Item 18. The writer recaps the ‘evidence’ he provided to support his theme.
Item 19. The writer restates his statement of interest, that he wants to study and effect change in issues relating to diversity and education.
Item 20. The writer wraps up his personal statement and reiterates his interest and goals, two of the questions asked on the application.
Revision Checklist: Personal Statement
Focus/Purpose
Do you have a central theme that is supported throughout your personal statement?
- Identify your theme or topic (an event that changed my outlook, a core belief, etc.). Make sure that all details and examples you include relate to and build up that theme.
- Develop your theme through a one or a few supporting examples. In a one-page statement, one detailed example should take up your whole writing space. In a two-page statement, one example may be sufficient, but two or three very closely related examples may be used.
- Make sure that your examples are explained in full and with descriptive detail. When the length of your statement is limited, it is best to offer fewer examples in great detail than to mention several very briefly.
Are all details in your examples and stories necessary and relevant?
- Consider why you are including the examples you have chosen.
- Include details that are necessary to understanding your examples and why you have chosen them to support your theme.
- Leave out details that do not add to the way your examples support your theme. For example, appearances and other minute character details are often not necessary to understanding a story.
Development/Elaboration
Does your introduction clearly express the theme and ‘point’ of your personal statement?
- Orient your reader to your topic and theme. Knowing what you are writing about and why from the beginning will help your reader understand the power of your statement.
- Find an interesting idea, quote, or brief anecdote short story or narrative of an incident, often funny or poignant, but always a simple, direct account to draw your reader in.
- State your theme and how it relates to the purpose of your personal statement or question to which you are responding.
Do your topic and theme make a statement about you as a person?
- Try to be original and creative. Think about what really matters to you in your life.
- Be honest. Do not fabricate make up stories to make your statement seem more interesting.
- Select a topic and theme that you can explain and support with stories and evidence from your life.
- Write about something that you care about. Sincerity and feeling are important vehicles that make a statement stand out.
Do you relate to your chosen topic through evidence and anecdote?
- Use informative and narrative styles to create connections between your life and the topic you chose.
- Choose stories and examples that are easily relayed. Tell your friends or family members the stories you want to include, and note the parts they find interesting or confusing and the questions they ask.
- Clearly link each story or example you provide to your topic or theme. Do not make your reader guess or assume why you include each story or example.
Does your conclusion wrap up all of your storylines and examples and relate them to the overall topic and theme of your statement?
- Make sure each anecdote and example you relate is complete before you start your conclusion.
- Summarize the connections between your stories and examples and your main topic in one or a few sentences.
- Be personal. Tell how the topic of your personal statement affects or says something about you.
- Try to avoid statements offering universal truths or morals.
Do you introduce your main point at the beginning of your statement? Do each of your paragraphs follow clearly from this point?
- State the overall direction — why you have chosen your topic and evidence — in your introduction.
- Check that each paragraph relates to your main topic and fits the direction of your statement.
- Be clear and upfront about what you are going to discuss. Surprise endings and humor are very difficult to pull off in formal writing forms such as personal statements. If you think you can successfully use humor or a twist to convey your point and your writing talents, have several people review and critique your writing. Remember, the admissions officer does not know you or your sense of humor. Do not include any jokes or twists that could be misread as offensive, pretentious, or otherwise negative.
Are each of your paragraphs organized around a story or example that is clearly related to your topic?
- Introduce each story or example by relating it to your topic or theme.
- Present your narrative or evidence in an order that is logical and consistent.
- Include necessary details in the correct order. When you make additions, make sure they fit into the flow of your stories and examples.
- Generally follow proper essay format, writing in complete sentences and organized paragraphs. Poems and other formats are sometimes successful, but for most, traditional
Organization
Do you introduce your main point at the beginning of your statement, and do each of your paragraphs follow clearly from this point?
- State the overall direction — why you have chosen your topic and evidence — in your introduction.
- Check that each paragraph relates to your main topic and fits the direction of your statement.
- Be clear and upfront about what you are going to discuss. Surprise endings and humor are very difficult to pull off in formal writing forms such as personal statements. If you think you can successfully use humor or a twist to convey your point and your writing talents, have several people review and critique your writing. Remember, the admissions officer does not know you or your sense of humor. Do not include any jokes or twists that could be misread as offensive, pretentious, or otherwise negative.
Are each of your paragraphs organized around a story or example that is clearly related to your topic?
- Introduce each story or example by relating it to your topic or theme.
- Present your narrative or evidence in an order that is logical and consistent.
- Include necessary details in the correct order. When you make additions, make sure they fit into the flow of your stories and examples.
- Generally follow proper essay format, writing in complete sentences and organized paragraphs. Poems and other formats are sometimes successful, but for most, traditional organization works best.
Language/Style
Do you use formal language that is appropriate for your audience?
- Use proper grammar and spelling.
- Use the active voice.
Use first person, active voice in most cases. The active voice is more direct and informative than the passive voice.- For example, instead of writing My passion for volunteerism was inspired by the lonely times I spent in the hospital with candy stripers for company., say The many times I felt lonely in the hospital when candy-striped nurses’ helpers kept my spirits up inspire my passion for volunteerism.
- Do not use text or IM shorthand (bc, IDK, U) or slang.
- Do not use derogatory terms to refer to race, ethnicity, gender, or other personal attributes.
Is your statement polished, correct, and complete?
- Review your statement for grammar errors and incomplete thoughts.
- Make sure you have included all necessary details in a logical order.
- Check the formatting requirements of your application. Follow their specified format (e.g., double spacing, font size). You may be asked to provide personal information in a header or at the top of your page.
- Do not title your personal statement.